Dolly Writes

Journey of a growing woman

Month: November, 2014

WHAT SOLANGE’S WEDDING TAUGHT ME

Image by Rog Walker

Okay, so by now, I’m sure most – if not all- of you have seen the slayage that was Solange Knowles’ wedding photos. If you haven’t, well that’s what I’m here for.

Who runs the world?

Who runs the world?

Breaking the internet like a QUEEN

Breaking the internet like a QUEEN

Hey Peasants! Lol

Hey Peasants! Lol

solange 4

My first love

My first love

I was in aweeeee!!!!!Like a lot of people at these photos and I don’t know what’s up with my hormones but I actually started crying because it was just so beautiful. She looks beautiful. They all looked amazing and you could feel the love from the photos.

But it wasn’t just the beauty of the photos that blew me away. It was the fact that she did her wedding her own way. What wedding have you seen the bride in a jumpsuit? Or seen the bride and groom arriving at their wedding in bikes? It was just so her. It was what she wanted. It wasn’t about traditions. It was just about being herself with the people she loved and being joined with her significant other in front of them and to me, that was everything.

I loved the fact that her family let her be herself. They didn’t tell her: “Oh, you have to wear a puffy dress”. No, they let her be herself. This moved be because, as a young girl, I go back and forth on how I want my wedding to be. There was a time I really wanted a small wedding with just about a 100 people max and I was discussing this with some friends. And one of them said:’Do you really think your parents will want that?’ And then it occurred to me that, Oh my God, that is so true. First of all, I’m Nigerian which means that we’re loud in everything. Secondly, I am the first child of my parents which also means that I’ll most likely get married first which also means that my parents will want everybody to be there. Thirdly, my mum likes to have an input in everything. As of now, she doesn’t like that I have coloured my hair. And that’s just one of the many things she likes to have a say in so imagine my wedding day?

Anyway, I just hope that when the time comes, my family will let me myself and will be supportive of whatever decision I make. But, for now, I will rejoice in the fact that these photos of Solange gave me hope.

Advertisements

NIGERIANS HAVE NO CHILL

chillpill_3_original-700x434

There are so many things I love about being Nigerian. I love the fact that we are just a weird bunch. It truly is amazing. We never defend our country unless we are out of it(Very patriotic). Don’t mess with our food, especially our Jollof because we will tear you a new one (Ask Jamie Oliver).

You will recognise Nigerians at the airport. I remember a time when I was going back home for the holidays. I took KLM so I had to stop over in Amsterdam to take a connecting flight to Nigeria. Looking for my gate was not difficult at all because from a mile away I could hear my country people having a conversation. It truly is amazing. I felt at home.

I love my country and I love the people. I am Nigerian till the death of me. However, we have one problem…a really big one – WE HAVE NO CHILL, NO CHILL WHATSOEVER. And I am not even talking about the comments they make about certain things like Kim Kardashian’s naked butt on the cover of Paper. Lol. Those comments. I am talking about Nigerians not minding their business. Honestly, its a big problem.

Okay, so a few days ago, I had a lecture at uni. So as I got to the lobby, I saw some friends. They were talking to this middle-aged Nigerian man. Now mind you, I have never spoken to this man in my entire life. We don’t gist, we don’t hang, we don’t even do the same course. I just wanted to say hi to my friends. I greeted them and I greeted him too out of respect.

He looked at me up and down and the first thing he said was: ‘Why did you paint your hair like this?’ Whattttttttt?!!!!!!! I was too stunned. Now, I know my blonde afro has been a topic of discussion for many because well, I’m a black girl who dyed her hair blonde. But isn’t it my business? Isn’t it my hair? How do you see someone for the first time and ask that kind of question? I would have appreciated it if he had waited for me to leave before discussing it but Noooooo…He just had to ask. It took every bone in my body to stop myself from saying: “Ehn OgA sIR, How is it your business?’ but I don’t have balls like that. So, I calmly said: “I wanted to do something different” and then I walked away.

Nigerians, I love them but they need to take a heavy dose of the chill pill.

Sorry I had to rant a little bit

BLACK AND WHITE

black-and-white-wallpaper-7

I felt the need to write today
Actually, I was reading about George Orwell
And just felt somewhat inspired

By the way, I recently just discovered that George Orwell
Was actually a pseudonym
It wasn’t his real name
His real name was Eric Blair
That was actually pretty interesting

And oh…

George Eliot

was a woman!

Amazing right?

Her real name was Mary Ann Evans
She used a male pen name
so that her work will be taken seriously

Anyway…
I realised that people like to believe sometimes
that things are simply black and white
but honestly, I really wish it was that simple
Things are not always black and white
There’s always a grey area

There’s that area that makes you question
If everything you ever believed was true

It’s kind of like
how a lot of people believe that
a person who takes the life of another
should go to prison for the rest of his/her life
or worse, should die.

However, what will you say about
the teenager who kills his father
to protect his mother?

The boy had endured abuse all his life…
He was just trying to not watch his mother get killed

What now can we say?

That’s why God remains the ultimate judge.

We, humans are not perfect…
And things…
Are never simply black and white

DOLLY-LAND

body-mind-soul-spirit-on-blackboard

My friend, Tomi messaged me this morning
He said: Hope all is well in dolly-land?
For some reason, the idea of dolly-land stuck
And I started to think of myself as a country
With different states: The body, the mind, the spirit and the soul

THE BODY

The body is an important part of dolly-land
It’s the first thing most people think about when dolly-land is mentioned
It’s like hearing Nigeria, and you think ‘Lagos’
Like hearing America and thinking ‘New York’
Or hearing England and thinking ‘London’
It’s the first thing people see and think about
The body in dolly-land is pretty much a beholder’s castle
Some people look at it and think ‘Woww’ and some people look at it and think ‘Meh’
The citizens of dolly-land like to believe that THE BODY is beautiful
But sometimes, it can’t help but think its ‘MEH’
They try not to feel insecure but it does happen sometimes
But the good thing about THE BODY in Dolly-land
Is that it doesn’t scare easily when it comes to changes
It’s one of the things that makes it special.

THE MIND

The mind is the brain of Dolly-land
It’s the parliament, the senate, the congress, the house of reps
Whatever you choose to call it.
It’s where the President resides
It’s where decisions are made
The MIND in Dolly-land
Is not the smartest cookie in the bunch
But it could be very open-minded
THE MIND in Dolly-land assimilates a lot of knowledge
It like to read about new things and learn about new things
Things that to others, might not seem so important
But it takes it in because you just never know
It could get distracted very easily, which is one of its many flaws
And it also procrastinates and does things last-minute
Which is not cool
But all in all, it tries its best to do what’s best for Dolly-land.

THE SPIRIT

The spirit in Dolly-land
It’s a tricky one.
It doesn’t necessarily have a particular job
But if I am to give it one, Ill say
It’s like the police of Dolly-land
This is because the spirit never sleeps
It’s always awake
Watching
And trying to become stronger
Because a strong spirit is good for Dolly-land.
It has to interact with a spirit much much much greater than its own
It has to be strong with God because God is the spirit that can make Dolly-land stronger.

THE SOUL

The soul in Dolly-land
Is the nucleus.
Without it, Dolly-land will not exist
It can never die
It lives on
It learns, it grows
It’s THE SOUL.

I don’t know what I just wrote but I felt good writing it. Thank you Tomi.