Disordered Loves


So, I’ve been thinking all day about what I wanted to share today. It’s been pretty difficult but I finally decided to share something I learnt a couple of weeks ago. There was this devotional by Timothy Kellar that I read called Making Sense of God. I liked it a lot because it presented a new way of thinking that I really liked. Anyway, he spoke on something called Disordered loves which is basically saying that the disorder of our lives is a reflection of the disorder of our loves.  He said it better than I’ll be able to so I’ll just put down some of the stuff that he wrote verbatim:

Augustine taught that we are most fundamentally shaped not as much by what we believe, or think, or even do, but by what we love. “For when we ask whether somebody is a good person, we are not asking what he believes or hopes for, but what he loves.” For Augustine, what we call human virtues are nothing more than forms of love. Courage is loving your neighbour’s well-being more than your own safety.


You may say that you believe in social equality and justice and think that you do, but if you make business decisions that exploit others, it is because at the heart level, you love your own prosperity more than your neighbour’s. In short, what you love most at the moment is what controls your action at that moment. “A body by its weight tends to move toward its proper place…My weight is my love: wherever I am carried, my love is carrying me.” You are what you love.


Augustine did not see our problems as stemming only from a lack of love. He also observed that the heart’s loves have an order to them, and that we often love more important things less. Therefore, the unhappiness and disorder of our lives are caused by the disorder of our loves.


A just and good person “is also a person who has [rightly] ordered his love, so that he does not love what is wrong to love, or fail to love what should be loved, or love too much what should be loved less (or love too little what should be loved more). “How does this work? There is nothing wrong with loving your work, but if you love it more than your family, then your loves are out of order and you may ruin your family. Or if you love making money more than you love justice, then you will exploit your employees, again, because your loves are disordered.


I really enjoyed reading this and it has stayed with me since then. It really gave me something to think about and I really want you guys to think about it as well and I would love to know your thoughts.

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